I never really bonded with my dad. I don’t know what happened. Maybe it was because he was in the Navy when I was born. I really don’t know why I didn’t bond with my father, but here I am today and I never went through any of those father issues with my father.

Instead, I bonded with my grandpa. I had all of those “Daddy’s Little Girl” moments with him instead. My grandma babysat me during the days when my parents worked. I remember waiting by the window for him to come home from work. The television was always on and when the MASH song came on the television, Grandpa would be home soon. To this day, those first few notes of the theme song to MASH give me that excited feeling of knowing that Grandpa is almost home.

I remember one time we got to make cookies. He said we could make the cookies from my <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = “urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags” />Sesame Street book. They were some sort of Surprise cookies that had many different candies in them and you wouldn’t know what kind of candy you would get until you bit into the cookie. He let me stand on the step stool while we stirred the cookie dough. I remember thinking, “I’m tall enough to marry Grandpa when I stand on this stool. We just need to get rid of Grandma.”

Of course, I am the kind of person who says those things out loud and when I did, Grandpa looked at me funny. I learned very quickly that it was weird to want to marry your grandpa. Pop psychologists always talk about the Oedipus complex. I actually remember feeling like that, so I know that I bonded with my grandpa some time before that day.

I still believe that he is invincible. I remember when Bobka sold her house in Pembina, North Dakota. Grandpa got her piano. He and three other men moved it into the house in Billings. It was my grandpa on one end of the piano and the three guys on the other side. I was sure that my grandpa could have moved the piano all by himself, he was that strong. It was just that Grandma insisted that he have help. He didn’t really need it.

I still believe that he is immortal. Bobka is still alive and celebrating her 100^th Birthday this year. My grandpa has longevity in his genes. Even though he turns 75 this year, I still believe he will live forever. Even though Grandma died almost ten years ago, I think he’ll outlive me. Even though he is my last living grandparent, I still believe he’s immortal. I have no trouble facing my own mortality. It’s facing his that’s the problem.

Today we recognize the fathers in our lives. I have a father. He has always done the best that he could with what he had. I have a father-in-law and he is the glowing reminder of where my husband came from. To hear him tell a joke is to see my husband encased in another body. I have a step-father. He’s new this year, but he has already jumped ahead of my dad in the race for my affections.

There is one person who will never fall behind, though, and that’s my grandpa. He will get his Father’s Day card and scold me for the Costco gift card I sent him just like he scolded me for the emergency car kit I sent him for Christmas. It doesn’t matter as long as he knows that he’s remembered this season and every season. Happy Father’s Day, Grandpa!