As I’m writing this, it’s snowing outside. There hasn’t been a lot of snow yet, but with these storms, it can go either way. I’ve lit a fire log, so the fireplace looks golden and enticing. I’m ready to hide in this house until the snow goes away.

I used to love snow. I can still see its beauty. It covers the neighborhood with shiny sparkling glitter. It dampens the noises of the neighborhood. It marks winter and Christmas and all those feelings of good cheer.

Then, I lost almost eighty pounds over the course of five years. The layer of fat that protected me from leering men and the cold is gone. I’m cold all the time now, even in the summer. The snow is pretty from my living room window, but I have no desire to venture out there. I used to just toss on a jacket. Now, I layer a turtleneck under a sweater under a hoodie under the leather coat.

I don’t know if I’ll ever get acclimated to this weather again. The winter hibernation begins.